Coorg Diary

Oh no, I didn’t make a quick trip to India to visit Coorg; just a walk down memory lane to relive my Coorg trip!

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One day soon after we graduated, tired of job-hunting and failed interviews, three of my close friends and I decided to go on a three day trip to Coorg. Permissions were sought and granted and tickets were duly booked. We decided to meet at R’s place on the D-day ( D for Departure ;)), as it was closest to the bus-stop and her father had agreed to drive us to the bus. Now R’s father is the meticulous kind who plans each trip to the minutest detail; so what ensued was a drill down session where he instructed us - individually and as a group about the travel plan and the Do’s and Don’ts. After he was convinced that each of us had memorized the entire itinerary, and could manage to return home in the event of losing the rest of the gang, we were asked to pack ourselves and our luggage into the Maruthi-800 and start for the bus-stand.

After saying our goodbyes and going through the schedule once again, we boarded the bus. I’m assuming I had a great night’s sleep because all I can remember after sinking into the seat is alighting at Coorg the next morning. Our hotel rooms were already booked by R’s father and thankfully the bus stopped at a walking distance from the hotel. Appreciating and enjoying the cool and pollution free weather (although I’m sure Bangalore also looks that way at 5.30 in the morning), we walked to the hotel.

A lawn with a pool, ducks swimming in it, a few foreigners sipping orange juice – seemed like a good enough hotel. We were ushered into a room meant for two and we quickly made sure the bed could accommodate four. It could, only if you were the kind of person who sleeps still, no room for tossing and turning here. An extra bed would cost an additional hundred, and it would be laid on the floor, no cot. Since none of us were willing to sleep on the floor, we decided to cram ourselves into the double cot. That settled, B announced she was having bath first, I screamed “next”, followed by S and R.

The room came with complimentary breakfast. Cool! But not so soon. Since the room was meant for two, we only got two coupons. That wasn’t a problem; we were used to digging into each others’ plates and were willing to do so now. We headed for the dining room and were informed that it was a buffet, and we could help ourselves. We checked out the food and man, what a spread. Two by four? With a spread like this, we could even manage a two by eight!

B and S loaded their plates with everything on display and we settled down at a table. Tired and famished we pounced on the food. Minutes later a waiter walked up to us and said “Madam, sharing not allowed”. What? There was no such notice put up anywhere, how were we supposed to know? The look on his face suggested, “It goes without saying”. So, R & S claimed they were full, while we continued hogging. Thankfully, the complimentary breakfast came only on the first morning, so we decided we would check out restaurants close by for the remaining 2 days; this after we were informed that a breakfast buffet costed 100 bucks! Unemployed girls, we could very well manage with the Rs.10 Khali Dosa down the street!

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To be continued... :)

Are We RV??

Was at Orkut sometime back and happened to click on the RVCE community for the first time. Someone had started a discussion on “Who’s doing what and where” and the response was not impressive merely by the numbers, but by the fact that all those who responded are doing extremely well for themselves. Studying in premier institutes and working in top companies. It's quite possible that only the successful ones chose to respond, losers like me kept away. Anyway, made me proud to be an RVite, even though I’m not doing anything myself!

Great college, fond memories, lovely friends! Hope to post something more about college soon. Until then, continue to rock RVites!!!

*I wrote that last sentence?!*

When Life isn't beautiful....

....talk to friends.

There are times when you just get bored of people. Tired of saying nice things and taking care not to hurt their feelings even when they do yours. You begin to doubt if there is a need to interact with people at all if most of the time you cannot say what you want to.

It’s during these times that you value friends. People you can call up at any time of the day and talk about anything; without being judged, without being misunderstood. It’s amazing how well they understand you and say things you want to hear. Self introspection would’ve given then same results, but the fact that there is someone who thinks the same way that you do is a great feeling.

How did we end up so similar? The same values, principles, shortcomings and strengths. We grew up together, talking about everyday incidents and laughing. Marathon sessions on the phone and walking to school and college together didn’t go waste after all. We became friends for life. We influenced each other and ended up being like one another. That’s the great thing about friendships. Tastes may differ, but core values remain the same. And that’s what keeps this wonderful relationship going.

Long live friendship! And a big hug to all my dear friends, starting with Sethu!

Feeling better already :)

From Here to Nowhere

I wash the dishes, press your clothes.
Lay the bed and knead the flour.
Serve the sick, play with your kids;
Shop for food and guard the door.

What lovely bangles, madam you wear.
That saree you are in, it’s beautiful I swear.
Such clean hands; and such smooth heels;
Your skin is fair, and silky, your hair.

Stay indoors, you’ll turn fair,
Of rough hands, work will take care.
You’ll be like madam, one day not far;
A house of your own, with kids and your man.

I wait for that day,
When he’ll take me away,
From the dirt and the slime,
To someplace sublime.

Now I wash my own clothes and mop my own floor.
Raise his children and guard my door.
He comes home at night, a madam in tow
He shoves me away, where do I go?

Ma, what of your promise?
And what of my dreams?
Smooth hands, fair skin...
You told me I’d win.

Love the smell of.....

Jasmine in a marriage hall.

The combined smell of camphor, agarbathi and flowers in a temple.

Hing in hot ghee.

Wet earth.

Freshly brewed coffee.

8th cross Malleswaram, the day before a festival.

Fragrant shampoo in hair.

Roasted jeera.

Mehendi, after washing the paste off your hands.

A new notebook.

Nail polish.

The combined smell of ghee and elaichi: a sweet in the making, surely!

All About Attitude

A link on Mohan's blog, took me to this site which determines one's probable death date based on a few details about one's lifestyle.

When I was totally honest, it said I was going to die at the age of 57. Now, 57 is waaaaay too young to die. Forget grandchildren, this means I would die even before my children think of getting married!

To push the date further, I lowered my BMI by four points and my life span increased by 7 years. 64 is a good age to die, but now in a mood to experiment, I changed my mode from "Pessimistic" to "Optimistic" and Voila! I'm going to live till the age of 103!

The test may not be accurate, but it makes you think if a positive attitude is all it takes to live a longer life? Maybe. Shedding the negativity and turning optimistic is easier said than done....there I go again. But then, I don't want to live a hundred years...

Poem? ho-hum.

I stopped writing poems,
Many years ago;
When a friend gently hinted,
That poems were not for me;
I’ve made a new beginning,
But I know I’m still as bad,
It doesn’t matter; does it?
It’s only just a start! :O)

Now, here's the actual poem:

Reflection
The face in the mirror,
No, that’s not me.
Those fine lines of age,
Those visible strands of grey,
The sorrow in those eyes,
No, it can’t be.

A baby in your arms,
A face in the crowd,
Small triumphs,
Great joys,
Sometimes bound,
Sometimes free.

I stop to look back,
On life that has been.
I’ve come very far,
My companions all gone,
When did they stop?
Oh! When did they leave?

The pale, wrinkled cheek,
The mist in those eyes,
The tremble in the hands,
Who is this I see?
Tell me it’s not me.
Oh! Tell me it’s not me.

It's a girl! :-) :-(

Nearly all of my mother’s friends that I met when I was in my teens said how my mom had longed for a baby girl all through her pregnancy. With her two elder sisters having had two sons each and with my brother being her first born, my mother was tired of all the boys in the family and desperately wanted a daughter.

My cousins got married a few years ago and when their baby was due, they were hoping for a baby girl too. More recently, my sister-in-law was in a similar situation. After looking at a scan of the baby’s face during the later stages of her pregnancy, everyone seemed to think it was going to be a boy. We were all proved wrong, and much to our delight I must add, when she gave birth to a cherubic baby girl!

While 24 years ago my mother wanted a girl after having had a son already, these young couples seem to prefer a single daughter to an only son. All this seems to hint that things appear to be finally looking up for the girl child in our society. Well, not so soon.

While on one end we have the financially stable, educated class of society pining for the girl child; on the other end of the spectrum we have female infanticide and sale of baby girls.

Muniratna, my maid servant’s daughter in Bangalore survived a near fatal abortion in the 4th month of her pregnancy after discovering that a fourth daughter was on her way. It is against the law to reveal the sex of fetus, but, there’s nothing that bribe can’t do. They are barely able to make ends meet, with her husband’s single income; but that doesn’t stop them from trying for a son after three daughters. She agrees with me that today, girls have equal opportunities and do just as well as their male counterparts. Being financially independent, they can look after parents just as well in their old-age; then, why the bias?

She tells me she can earn the respect of her family members only if she can bear a baby boy! Her in-laws want a boy to carry the family name forward – a vamshodhaarak. Another girl would mean more expenses, hence the abortion. More expenses? “We have to get her married and that costs a lot of money.” she says. And then there is the dowry. It never occurred to me that people would prefer a son to a daughter to avoid marriage expenses. Our culture, which expects the bride’s family to bear the cost of a lavish wedding, while the groom’s family sits back and enjoys the festivities without having to spend a penny, is to blame.

Educated, financially independent girls, put their foot down alright. But when there are more children than a small income can support, who gets the preference for higher education? Won't the birth of a son, thwart Muniratna’s daughters’ chances of that valuable education?

Idling....

Lots of free time gives me the chance to take a peek into people's lives(through blogs). Friends, friends' friends, acquaintances and total strangers. And everyone seems to be working or studying further. Getting ahead in life. Realising dreams.

And I think....

Life is like a Marathon. We all begin. Some of us pause, some stop, some go on and reach the finish line. Some reach soon, some reach later. But they reach. Are they the winners?

I've paused. I hope the pause doesn't get long enough to become a stop.



PS: Thanks to Shomo's suggestion, you can now e-mail your comments to me by clicking on 'write to me' below. If you want to. :)